they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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