Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
