CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
