you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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