I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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