What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
