New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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