my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
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