Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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