I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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