Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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