I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I just found a bag of teeth...
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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