Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
