yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
