is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
