you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize