I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
