I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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