I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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