I want to make a zoo with you.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
