listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Maybe he injected his testicle?
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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