your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize