And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
