what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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