My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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