I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
