gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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