hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
