I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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