i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
