dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Randomize
