This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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