I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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