Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
