Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
