now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
