were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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