I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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