I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize