Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
