Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Randomize
