Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
