I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I just forgot I was standing up.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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