She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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