..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
