Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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