There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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