first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
My vagina just clenched in fear
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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