would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Randomize
