At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
only if we run a train.
done.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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